Do Ya Think I’m Sexy

Last night I went out with a friend to one of the bars here that’s more popular with the Chinese. The decor of this place is indescribable – imagine if the most glamorous bat mitzvah ever was held inside a magical clock and it was also a fanta ad produced by Disney – and the amount of stuff going on was definitely conducive to sensory overload. We walked in and they were playing run of the mill techno, albeit with a loose Latin theme. Then they had a woman wearing a skirt so short Lindsay Lohan would’ve been ashamed and a top that brought to mind Christina Aguilera circa "Dirrty" (accessorized with one sequined fingerless glove!) sing a bunch of songs in Chinese, then played some disco, then had two girls get on stage and dance to the Pussycat Dolls, then had some more disco. Then a giant Chinese guy dressed in a Reggie Bush jersey, baggy jeans and bright gold sneakers sang a bunch of Chinese songs. Oh, and then they had a male pole dancer, wearing black leather over-the-knee boots, sequined underwear and a sequined bandana around his eyes. All this in an hour and a half.

As the pole dancer took to the stage and started writhing about acrobatically, the waitress standing next to me turned and asked if I thought he was sexy. "Do you think he’s sexy?" I returned. "No!" she exclaimed, "He is too sexy. I can’t stand it." Only in China.

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