The Incapable Cook: (American) Salad Making

Is a “cooking” post too trite at this point? I feel like everyone is posting recipes and pictures of food, so here’s my first foray into the world of lifestyle-cum-foodie blogging: the Incapable Cook. Volume 1! In stores now!

This isn’t really a cooking post (hence the quotation marks), it’s more about simple things normal people can do in a kitchen without lighting themselves on fire, such as open a bottle of wine. Which I tried doing with a pair of scissors the other week…bad idea (but I didn’t set myself on fire!) Chances are, if I’m in the kitchen, I’m also swearing like a sailor – a big, burly, drunken sailor who wants to maul an angry bear that challenged him to a swearing contest.

Above is my photo of a salad I made! My goal when I moved out on my own was to eat/shop as much as possible from local/locally-owned outlets. Ask friends of mine who’ve gone grocery shopping with me – I’m that dude asking Where is this from? Where is that from? But how did it get here? (See: Portlandia, “Ordering the Chicken“.) I would like to say that I’ve been doing a great job, but it’s not so simple. Admittedly my father still helps me out with a mixture of supplementary food products from Walmart and Whole Foods and while I’m a newly devout patron of the Market Street Market, a lot of their offerings aren’t local. (Which is not to say they’re a bad business, it’s just a personal frustration. They’re still awesome and the cashier there is really pretty and I’m jealous.)

I like to stop by Grand market on West Main Street to pick up spices (their pepper is like, actually better than other places’) and healthy snacks (their nuts selection is nuts! hahaha gross, not punny) and I’ve started heading a door down from there to get meats, cheeses and greens from Feast. It felt as if it’d been awhile since I vlogged, so below you’ll find a terrible and pointless video of me talking about salad, but watch it because I’m just so pretty.


5 thoughts on “The Incapable Cook: (American) Salad Making

  1. Hahahahaha……. Try some goat cheese on it and add a few raspberries. When I come back home, I will bring some light balsalmic sauce for you that you should drizzle on your salad with a tiny bit of extra virgin olive oil.

    • Oh yeah, I forgot to mention I’d added this one Spanish cheese…starts with an M but forget the name. Goat cheese is brilliant though! And thanks in advance for the dressing, Mary Jo!

  2. your vlog made me laugh bc you’re so random sometimes! One thing I miss about the states is salad! China doesn’t know how to make salads end of story haha

    • I know, I’m OOC, basically. And yeah, SO agree. I found one place in my town that had good salad…they were Japanese. I don;t know if you have a Japanese place near you, but FYI.

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